I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
