I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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