what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie