Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Do vagina's smell?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
