Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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