Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Ketchup is God's man juice
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Randomize
