I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
