I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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