So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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