Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize