Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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