Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
