I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
