quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
