I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize
