I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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