STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
