gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize