Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Randomize
