If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
