I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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