Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
you would pick up someone in the library
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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