what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
