her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
