we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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