I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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