Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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