In America we eat man semen.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
All the doctor said was why
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
