Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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