Texts From Last Night

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  (540): View more from Virginia

  It was kinda weird being the boss

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  Did you feel like Tony Danza?

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  (540): It was kinda weird being the boss (1-540): Did you feel like Tony Danza? http://tfl.nu/xn58
  Replies (1) Good night (1611) Bad night (589)
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  (925): View more from California

  im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy

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  (925): im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy http://tfl.nu/0d9q
  Replies (19) Good night (2726) Bad night (715)
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  (831): View more from California

  i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3

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  (831): i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3 http://tfl.nu/5ewa
  Replies (22) Good night (5574) Bad night (737)
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  (415): View more from California

  Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.

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  (415): Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that. http://tfl.nu/ab18
  Replies (30) Good night (3772) Bad night (831)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.

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  (519): so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours. http://tfl.nu/o2pq
  Replies (15) Good night (4578) Bad night (1454)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.

  (219): View more from Indiana

  You said that last year...

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  (260): Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate. (219): You said that last year... http://tfl.nu/7qlf
  Replies (18) Good night (2056) Bad night (5508)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.

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  (608): May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in. http://tfl.nu/2att
  Replies (6) Good night (3672) Bad night (976)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.

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  (778): We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's. http://tfl.nu/nlsl
  Replies (12) Good night (2902) Bad night (1027)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.

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  (586): I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me. http://tfl.nu/23ps
  Replies (8) Good night (4035) Bad night (762)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.

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  (+61): We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia. http://tfl.nu/ry0s
  Replies (2) Good night (2178) Bad night (586)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?

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  (405): Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream? http://tfl.nu/ecpk
  Replies (17) Good night (1705) Bad night (578)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell

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  (702): One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell http://tfl.nu/48fd
  Replies (8) Good night (825) Bad night (460)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body

  (1-778): View more from British Columbia

  I wish I could understand how you function in society

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  (778): it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body (1-778): I wish I could understand how you function in society http://tfl.nu/9z0t
  Replies (4) Good night (1602) Bad night (520)
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  (530): View more from California

  How on earth did you break your wrist?

  (1-530): View more from California

  I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing

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  (530): How on earth did you break your wrist? (1-530): I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing http://tfl.nu/cks1
  Replies (2) Good night (1578) Bad night (375)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.

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  (309): My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers. http://tfl.nu/lxb6
  Replies (1) Good night (605) Bad night (213)

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