dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize