I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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