Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
