Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
