Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
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