she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
