Plan B is the new Plan A
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
