My hand turned me down
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize