so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize