i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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