my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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