Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
