Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
