did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Randomize
