real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
