Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
