Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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