u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
