A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize