This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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